Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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