Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
