quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
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