Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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