He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
