He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
