whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I CAN MOONWALK!
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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