with your own penis?
I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
