The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Randomize
