He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
