Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
She even gives head with a lisp.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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