Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
