Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
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