with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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