Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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