Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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