Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
