3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
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