I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
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