All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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