I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
The beer is more important than you right now.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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