She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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