Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
A+ Viking dick
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize