Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
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