I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
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Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
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Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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