You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
