need another drink. this is the easiest way
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize