I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
