he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
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if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
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What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.