I could have mohawked her pubes.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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