David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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