Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
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