He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
