So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Randomize
