Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
