dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize