Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
