Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Randomize
