if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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