quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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