Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
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