i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
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Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
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So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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