ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
