just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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