Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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