I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
