my mouth tastes like poor choices
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize