don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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