I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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