It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
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long story
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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